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Orange Is The New Black Season Three Season Premiere

Previously on Orange Is The New Black: Piper and Larry are done. Rosa’s cancer accelerates and with only weeks to live, steals a van and runs over Vee. Piper rats on Alex who is likely headed back to Litchfield. Red seems to be recovering from the beat down Vee gave her. Pornstache publicly professes his love for Daya and gets arrested. Daya is still pregnant with Bennett’s baby, which no one knows about except the Latinas and Caputo. Fig is out and Caputo is in. Spoiler free review here – which for those of you who know me, is very difficult for me to accomplish.

Season 3 begins on Mother’s Day at Litchfield Penitentiary. However, my first thought isn’t: “how is Mother’s Day handled in a women’s penitentiary.” My thought is, “WTF happened to Rosa and Vee?” Keep in mind that I like Vee as much as I like Agent May from AoS. Well, a little less than half way through the season premiere, we are informed about Vee and Rosa’s fates or do we? Leave it to the writers of the show to give a vague but not so vague answer to everyone’s burning question.

Oh yes, Mother’s Day. The prison is all aflutter as they prepare for visitations. The outdoors are being prepared with games and clown makeup stations. Sophia’s salon is bursting with clients wanting to get their hair did for the upcoming festivities. And we get to see more of how the minds of some of our favorite inmates and prison staff operate. I have always known that prison inmates are very resourceful due to my former career but the Litchfield girls know their stuff. I think the best part of it all was Sophia having a heart to heart with her son about man issues. Sophia, having been assigned a male gender at birth and is now female, gave some questionable advice to her adolescent son about dealing with women. His response was priceless.

Of course, you can’t have any celebration at Litchfield Penitentiary without a whole lot of snags. Drugs are smuggled in, children get lost, and Bennett can’t stay away from Daya, much to Caputo’s dismay. And wait until you see what happens when Piper and Alex are reunited. Later on in the season, there is a scene that reminded me of the old Krystal Carrington and Alexis Colby fights on Dynasty, only the lesbian version.

One of the things that I love most about this show is how they keep me on the edge of my seat and thoroughly entertained for the full 50 minutes. The writers don’t miss a beat and continually throw these curve balls that one can’t possibly expect.

The biggest draw for me with regards to this show has always been the character development. If you want me to invest my precious time watching your show, make me care about the characters in it. OITB does just that. My favorite scenes are usually the flashbacks about the various inmate’s lives prior to incarceration.

So five episodes in and I am in love with this show as much as I was since the beginning. My only regret is that I don’t have the luxury of binge watching the entire season over the weekend.

I give the season premiere of OITNB 5 orange jumpsuits out of 5

by Tony Ortega

About Armand (1270 Articles)
Armand is a husband, father, and life long comics fan. A devoted fan of Batman and the Valiant Universe he loves writing for PCU, when he's not running his mouth on the PCU podcast. You can follow him on Twitter @armandmhill
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